If your life is in full swing, you are probably surrounded by friends and acquaintances.
But if difficulties suddenly appear on the horizon, then everything will change dramatically in the opposite direction: many of your girlfriends from yesterday will disappear without a trace, as if they had never existed.
Believe me, even those friends you trusted more than others will leave you!
We tend to make mistakes in people. This is not surprising, because we believe to the very end that they are honest, decent and sincere.
However, being tripped up by your best friend will shock you beyond belief. It means she is not your friend at all, but was just pretending to be one.
Pay attention to her behavior. If you find one of the signs below, you should be wary. Do not break off relations with this person immediately, if everything is not so critical. Remember one thing: she is an unreliable person!
She quickly starts judging you.
When you share your problems with a friend, you don't get the sympathy you need from her.
She explains to you in detail where exactly you went wrong and what specific action led to such disastrous consequences.
Of course, you also need such feedback. But it will be better if the person first consoles and encourages you, and then points out your mistakes and provides valuable recommendations. Such a friend is more of a strict judge than a close person.
She makes demands on you and demands that you trust her completely.
This girl considers you her close friend. It turns out that you should let your friend in on your secrets, tell her about your worries and troubles.
In her opinion, you have no right to hide anything. She boldly violates your personal boundaries and pesters you with unceremonious questions even when you do not want to develop a certain topic.
When you hide intimate details, the girl, looking offended, throws at you: "I thought you were my friend. How wrong I was!"
She believes that you only experience negative emotions.
Such a person confidently makes diagnoses in those areas that are sometimes incomprehensible to you: your own emotions, actions, feelings, and so on.
For example, you may hear her say something like: "You are overcome with envy, that is why you are nervous" or "Don't be angry with me, everything is fine." Interesting point: this young lady is fixated on negative emotions.
The girl feels like everyone is constantly angry with her, envious of her, or even hates her. That's why she gives you negative emotions too.
It is possible that she herself treats those around her unkindly, and so is waiting for a stab in the back.
She ignores you when it suits her.
You are telling your friend about something very important, but at the most interesting part she interrupts your story: "This is so exciting and unusual! You can't even imagine what happened to me just yesterday...".
After that, you reluctantly listen to her long story about all sorts of nonsense - about a broken nail, about a burnt pie, about tea spilled on the floor.
She has no intention of understanding and listening to you. Your selfish friend is completely devoid of empathy.
She adheres to principles that are beneficial to herself.
As soon as you ask your friend for something, she immediately finds a bunch of serious reasons that give her the right to refuse to help you. Each of her excuses sounds very convincing and meaningful.
For example, she does not lie under any circumstances, which means she will not cover for you at work.
On top of that, she never interferes in other people's affairs, which means she won't allow you to complain to her about a cruel and despotic husband.
She forbids you to criticize yourself constructively.
You cannot criticize your friend even in a soft and tactful manner, because you know that every word you say will be received with extreme hostility by her.
In response to your statement, she pouts: "How can you say such a thing?! Your comments are ruining our entire friendship!" But can appropriate criticism harm a true friendship? On the contrary, it can bring tangible benefits to the one being criticized.
She behaves unpredictably and strangely.
Sometimes you are even afraid to tell this girl your secrets. This happens for two reasons:
1. You are not sure that your girlfriend will keep her mouth shut.
2. Her reaction may be the most unpredictable.
Communicating with this person is like walking through a minefield: you risk being blown up at any moment.
A word spoken carelessly by you often causes her to feel hurt and cry. You have no opportunity to relax next to your unpredictable friend. This is very sad.
She doesn't know how to behave properly in company.
From time to time you have to hide your plans from your girlfriend. For example, an upcoming party or the arrival of guests.
You don't invite her to join your fun, and you feel guilty. But you can't do otherwise, because the presence of this young lady at such events is extremely undesirable. She says all sorts of nonsense, laughs loudly and brazenly pesters decent guys.
As a result, the whole company's ears wilt and the mood deteriorates. Some even run away from your house, just so as not to see this tactless girl anymore.
But you can't refuse to communicate with your friend, because she is so kind and understanding. However, nothing can be done about this flaw of hers!
Previously, we talked about how to stop taking everything to heart .
