Conflicts are inevitable in our lives. They happen at work, at home, in relationships. The main thing is to learn to resolve them constructively, without destroying the relationship.
First, you need to learn to listen and understand your opponent. Don't interrupt, let them speak. Ask clarifying questions to understand the essence of the problem from their side.
Second, talk about your feelings and needs calmly, without blaming. For example, "I'm upset because I can't get work done because of the noise" instead of "You're disturbing my work!" This makes it easier to find a solution.
Third, offer several options for a solution that take into account the interests of both parties. For example, agree on a quiet time or buy headphones. Agree on compromises.
If emotions are running high, it is better to postpone the conversation. Calm down, think about the situation, and then return to the dialogue. The main thing is to resolve conflicts together, not against each other.
Conflicts come in many forms, from trivial disputes to serious differences of opinion. But there are general rules that help resolve them constructively.
First, you need to tune in to a dialogue, not an argument. In an argument, everyone defends their position and tries to win. In a dialogue, they try to understand each other and find a solution that suits both parties.
Secondly, discuss not positions, but the interests and needs of each. For example, a wife wants her husband to help more around the house. Instead of complaining, it is better to say that she is tired and needs help. The husband can explain that he needs rest after work. This makes it easier to find a compromise.
Third, don't get personal or put each other down. This will only make the conflict worse. Discuss actions, not character traits. Be polite and respectful.
And lastly, don't drag it out. The longer the conflict is brewing, the harder it is to resolve it. Sit down and talk calmly. Or contact a mediator if you can't find a solution. The main thing is to act, not to remain inactive. Then any conflict can be resolved!
As you know, it is better to prevent a conflict than to resolve it. Therefore, it is important to learn how to prevent unnecessary clashes. How to do this?
First, show respect for others. Don't make harsh comments out loud, don't ignore others' opinions. Being polite reduces tension.
Secondly, know how to convey your position correctly. Speak calmly, to the point, offer alternatives. Do not impose your opinion, but argue it.
Third, learn to sense the mood of your interlocutor. If you see that the person is starting to boil, it is better to postpone the conversation. Let him calm down before continuing.
Fourth, control your emotions. Even if your opponent is rude, respond calmly and politely. Do not stoop to attacks and insults.
And finally, be able to compromise. Find a middle ground to suit both sides. The main thing is not to try to insist on your own at all costs. Then you can avoid conflicts.
Earlier we talked about how to get along with a stubborn husband .
Expert: Julia Tychino
