What the phrase "I heard you" actually means: how to react to it correctly
The phrase "I heard you" was popular at one time, but in reality it didn't carry any semantic meaning.
In other words, this is banal empty talk, which indicates a disregard for the interlocutor.
It is mainly used by managers, to whom senior specialists and ordinary employees come with some requests.
They are quite officially informed of complete indifference and apathy towards their difficulties and troubles.
Yes, the man heard, he is not deaf. But he did not take it into account, did not draw any conclusions, did not promise anything. It seems like there was a conversation, but at the same time it did not happen.
The main reasons why you shouldn't say this phrase are:
1. This is a demonstration of arrogance and vanity. The interlocutor seems to rise above, even if he really is higher in position and status. But it is one thing when it is only on paper, and quite another to emphasize this difference with words and intonation. As a rule, "I heard you" is said very arrogantly, with hidden pretension, passive aggression and poorly concealed irritation.
As if the speaker is obliged to immediately shut up and leave, without interfering with the "high-ranking person" working and toiling. It is better to say nothing or promise to think about the proposal made.
2. It is deceptive from the first to the last word. "I heard you" actually sounds about the same as "we will call you back" for the applicant.
It’s very mundane, superficial and false: all adults understand perfectly well that after such words no one will call.
The arrogant leader is clearly not interested in the subject of the conversation, he has not heard anyone and is not going to do anything. This is a waste of time, a show-off and offensive condescension.
3. It creates a negative attitude on the part of the interlocutor. It will be unpleasant for any person to realize that he has been ranting in his boss's office for no reason.
And in personal relationships it is extremely unpleasant to hear something like this: as if you opened your soul and someone spat on it. It is much more polite and effective to say something like "I will think about your proposal, and in two days I will call you for discussion."
Even if there is a refusal, it will look more decent and respectable.
The person will demonstrate his own competence as a boss, responsibility and commitment. This will be able to maintain his authority among colleagues and subordinates.
From the above it is clear that if a person is unlucky enough to be the one "heard", then he should refuse any conversations with this person, be it a director, a lover, a friend, a relative. He is clearly not valued or respected, and they do not hide it.
This kind of disdain is shown by tyrant bosses or those bosses who have favorites.
Naturally, the victim is not one of them, otherwise they would talk to him differently. So you will have to distance yourself and not have any illusions: you should forget about friendly and trusting relationships.
Thus, the phrase "I heard you", unfortunately, is rightfully considered the most false and insincere. This is often the way hidden boors reason, who, according to their position, are not supposed to swear and call names, so they try to bite their subordinates in such a simple way.
It seems like the answer is as correct as possible, does not contain obscene language or other nasty things, but the interlocutor feels spat on.
You can even adopt this habit of an unloved boss or toxic relative: reminding them of your excellent hearing. Even if it doesn’t have the desired effect, it will help you to distract yourself and not take what is said too personally.
Previously, it was reported what divorced women regret.
