How to recover from a divorce and start a new life: advice from professionals

10.09.2024 05:10

Divorce is a very strong stress for a person, because life is now divided into “Before” and “After”.

And it is very difficult to cross out a past life and start building new relationships.

Let's take a closer look at some advice from professionals that will help you survive this unpleasant situation and start living a full, happy life again.

The stage of acceptance of what happened

The hardest and most unpleasant phase (after the terrible word "Divorce"). It is worth warning right away that this phase can last for quite a long time.

The fact of full acceptance of the divorce and the fact that the family is no more is the main step to building a future. There is no need to cherish the useless hope that the partner will realize the mistake and return.

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Photo: Pixabay

Don't blackmail your ex that you'll do something to yourself. It won't bring back the old relationship. You'll have to accept this fact and move on.

Operation to reduce mental pain

To make adequate decisions (for which you won't have to blush later) you need a "cool" head and sober thinking. But for this you need to reduce the ocean of mental pain that rages and overwhelms the consciousness with heavy waves of emotions.

To do this, you first need to cry. It doesn't matter if you are alone or in the company of friends and relatives.

The main thing is to at least partially express your emotions.

The second point is to speak out. If there is no reliable person nearby – no problem! Thanks to the Internet, you can anonymously post your experiences on any suitable resource. But it is worth considering right away that this is not a weapon of revenge on your ex-partner, but a way to resolve negative emotions!

The third point is to do sports. It is scientifically proven that physical exercise helps reduce the amount of stress in the body and switch to other thoughts.

Increasing the amount of positive emotions in life

To further combat stress, you will need to increase the amount of "Joy" hormones in your body - serotonin and dopamine. To do this, you need to add "Joy" products to your diet: bananas, chocolate (in small doses!), fatty sea fish, lean meat and nuts.

Also, to increase the hormones of “Joy”, you need to devote more time to yourself and your affairs.

Take up a hobby, get a new haircut, take additional courses in professional training, go to a sanatorium or a short trip to another city, or change your image. Changing activities, environments, and achieving new goals (even small ones) will help you feel a surge of joy and inspiration for new things.

Don't close yourself off from your pain.

Don't close yourself off to your feelings and spend all your free time within four walls. Force yourself to go out to "People".

Go to exhibitions, cinema, cafes and even courses. This way you can overcome the main fear that arises after a breakup: “I can’t do anything without him (or her).”

Another bonus is that when you are in a crowd and talking about different topics (for example, about the topic of a course or about the topic of an art exhibition), you can literally physically feel the feeling of loneliness and uselessness receding.

Instead, calmness, interest in life and people around you come. An understanding appears that you are a very interesting person.

It is important to learn to trust again

This is the hardest thing after a breakup. After all, the fear that you can be used again, easily replaced and abandoned has firmly settled in the subcortex.

And this fear is also “accompanied” by the fear that the new relationship will not be what you previously dreamed of.

But it is worthwhile to push the past aside for your own sake (without forgetting it!) and carefully, gradually rebuild new relationships. The main phrase is “For your own sake.” No one else will do it for you.

Author: Valeria Kisternaya Editor of Internet resources

Content
  1. The stage of acceptance of what happened
  2. The main thing is to at least partially express your emotions.
  3. Increasing the amount of positive emotions in life
  4. Don't close yourself off from your pain.
  5. It is important to learn to trust again